Bangkok Monday Hash House Harriers
Run Report
Last updated: 28 July, 2009
Run no:- 1372 Date:- 6 July 2009
Location:- Phutta Bucha Soi 36
Hare:- Bruised Willy
Scribe:- Golden Shower
My hangover and I met the usual crowd at the Landmark hotel in order to share a cab for what was expected to be a wet run. It had been pouring rain since 2pm and one look at the sky was telling us that the rain was nowhere close to stop.
We all jumped in taxis and my hangover suddenly got worse with No No, Bad Boy Bobby and Douglas talking at the same time to the taxi driver who was looking confused as he was obviously given 3 different directions. We finally made it to the restaurant which surprisingly was the right one. The hares greeted us, a beer already in their hand. At 5.36 (with Bog Diver being out the country, the timing wasn't completely respected), Dunkin' Donut sent us off. Almost everyone left although Jumpstart and a couple of other people decided it was definitely too wet to run.
To my own surprise, my legs started moving by themselves and I followed the pack who was running fast in order to warm up a little under this heavy tropical rain. The first check on the road was a complete disaster. People running in every directions, shouting around and looking for the wet paper. After 10 mn, someone finally saw the paper and off we were into the jungle. The trail took us through some klongs, a few houses with lots of dogs, a goat farm and lots of jungle with mud and river crossings. I was lucky enough to stay close to the front runners either because they would spend an awful long time to break the checks or because due to AKM and Booba Lub's agility, a traffic jam would occur when crossing small and dodgy bridges. I finally lost them some 500m from the end of the trail but I was 'lucky' to spot Spinning Dwarf not too far ahead. I sped up a little to catch up with him and the two of us arrived at the final intersection. At this point, in spite of paper being visible on the ground and going to the right, Spinning Dward, looking at his GPS, told me : The beer's this way! And he pointed his finger to the opposite direction. I am a female, a blond one (!) and having obvious intellectual limitations, I made the wrong decision and decided to follow Todd. After a few hundred meters, my guide looked again at his GPS, mumbled something ( I think it was about having forgotten to reset his GPS after his last treasure chase in Isarn), and turned around and walked back to the paper. Completely disturb and confused, I started trotting behind him and soon we saw the paper and after one last turn to the right, we found the restaurant.
The circle was called by Dunkin Donut but as no one understood him, it took a few more minutes to get the hashers round up. Charges were called, AKM did his usual obituary but no one was listening to him as our attention had been caught by the fantastic hot dogs that Lion King had brought from home. We just wished he had spotted them too as he would have been too busy eating instead of annoying us with his stories. Eventually, nominations for POW started. Nut Sucker was nominated for wearing the ugliest rain coat ever, our visitor Bwana for being deaf and not wearing his hearing-aids during the run, Peter Haycox for talking like Audrey Hepburn, Booba-Lube for abusing AKM (Stand like a man, you fucker!) while crossing a klong and later smashing his balls on the trunk by slipping over and Spinning Dwarf for a reason I can't remember (or maybe it was just for being Spinning Dwarf). It was the latter who won the contest and since we had no POW, we used one of the hot dog bun as a substitute. This was where AKM forced me to kneel in front of Spinning Dwarf who was playing with the biggest cock he ever held in his hands. Feeling a sudden hunger, I took a mouthful of the bun, provoking exclamations of horror and disgust from most of the crowd and exclamations of delight and excitement from Lion King and Anal Rappe (bunch of perverts!).
Finally, the circle was dismissed and our favorite French Joint Master asked the 'ares where the HON HON HON was... Bruised Willy pointed in the direction of a private room of the restaurant and everyone proceeded to move there. We stopped Jumpstart and Mudgard from starting a karaoke session by hiding the microphone and everyone was able to enjoy their meal. I finally left the place a beer in a hand by 10.30pm, working on my next hangover and thanking the hares for an excellent run and dinner
***
On Monday 6 July we had 20 Harriers, 9 Harriettes, 0 new boots and 2 visitors, total = 31. Returners included Vichai Cool, Piya, Malinee, and Sukanya.
