BMH3 Run report

Run: 1683 22 June 2015
Location: Ban Macam Restaurant, Bang Sue
Hare: The Pink Panther

An Awesome Run

Amongst the usual ne'er do wells at this week's run were a few less-than-familiar faces. A few runners were asking who 'Where's my beer?' was, and in fact he is a Canadian who runs with us once or twice a year. After a long absence, Fawlty Towers had decided to join us for 200 baht's worth of fun, upsetting Hash Cash as Fawlty had just been demoted to the inactive list. Over Sexed also graced us with his presence, and just before the start Lurch arrived sans bicycle (yes, this is a multi-lingual write up. I might even work a Thai word into it before the end). Shaggy turned up, and unusually he had not just come from the airport. He had heard a rumour that there would be a virgin runner and wanted to check her out. However, his plan wasn't very well considered as he got City Girl to drive him to the run.

As the trains rolled past and the hypothetical clock chimed 5:30 the newly plastered GM called the pack to order to hear words of wisdom from the hare – Pink Panther, a.k.a. the Nonthaburi Samlor King. He told us that the trail would not go over the railway tracks, and that 80% of it would be virgin territory (this claim was later disputed by Sheep Shagger who thought only 20% was new). The long trail was 7km, but there was a short cut at a check where long runners would go right – no, left, and short runners would go straight on.

By now Boob-a-lube was getting impatient, so we followed him out onto the street and headed north parallel to the railway tracks. It soon became apparent that you had to look carefully for the trail markings as the hare had been very environmentally friendly with the paper (i.e. mean), and often during the run the pack over-ran turnings and checks. It wasn't long before Boob-a-lube had disappeared from sight and it was the silhouette of Shaggy that we were following. We soon left the road and entered into a labyrinth of alleys through slums and dirty klongs.

The trail took us along a narrow ledge with a rancid klong a metre below us on the left and a wall on our right, and it was here that I became aware of bright orange shirt behind me. It was beneath an unfamiliar face – the face of a visitor - Wheelie Bin - from Melbourne who had arrived late but caught the pack up. He was youthful by BMH3 standards (i.e. under 60), and despite wearing what looked like a heavy backpack was usually out in front of the pack.

Before long we reached the point where the long and short trails split. The long trail took the pack down the side of Klong Prapa, but after a few hundred metres the paper disappeared. A search revealed that the trail went over a footbridge across the klong, which was obscured by a dustcart. It then went back up the other side of the klong to rejoin the short trail. We then had to cross a main road where Bangkok's finest were pressing the buttons (or not as the case turned out) to control the traffic lights. Despite (or perhaps because of) Becassine (Som) smiling sweetly at the cop across the road he kept the traffic flowing for about ten minutes before we could cross.

We were soon back in small sois, and went through a market where a tattoo shop was doing good business beautifying Thai bodies. We kept heading west, and went through an area where fine carved wooden furniture is made and sold. At the start of the run the hare had said that we would reach 'big water', and that we would go no further. It soon became apparent that the 'big water' would be the river, and sure enough we soon reached it. We had already clocked about 6km, so we were glad to find that the trail home went more or less straight along small sois and paths. At one point we had to cross a busy main road where there were no traffic lights or footbridge, but the motorcy taxi drivers fearlessly stepped into the road to make the traffic stop for us.

After clocking about 9km we got back to the start, where the usual refreshments were provided by Crash and her assistant. After social drinking the newly returned GM called the pack to order. Being a visitor, Wheelie Bin was asked what he thought of the run, and his reply was 'Awesome'. No one could disagree with this judgement. Down-downs were handed out to the hare, returners, visitors, virgins etc. There was no RA present so Noriega stepped up to the job. At about this time it started to rain lightly, and as it gradually got heavier the business of the circle was carried out with more and more urgency. A quick vote for prick-of-the-week was won by the hare, and after that runners quickly relocated to the restaurant to avoid the rain.

All characters in this write-up are entirely fictitious and any resemblance to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental.

Bangkok Monday Hash House Harriers