Run: 1695 14 September 2015
Location: The other Cowboy Restaurant (on the Outer Ring Road East)
Hares: Malinee "Nibbles" K, KC “Boob-a-Lube” M. and Nid “Sizzler”

Scribe: Virginia Slim

A few days before the run, ยาย Malinee asked KC for help, so the trail became a U.S. military operation. When the military is involved, as we all know, things don’t always go according to plan. While setting the trail, KC zigged when he should have zagged, and they accidentally marked an extra 3-kilometre loop. When the hare and co-hares arrived back at the run site, Sizzler collapsed from exhaustion, while Malinee and KC had to go back out in Malinee’s car to pick up the extra 3 kilometres of paper.

Arriving back at the run site again just before the runners started, KC informed us that the beginning of the trail was virgin. He also thinks that some of the girls in Patpong are virgins. Regardless of whether its hymen was intact or not, the trail did have a lovely start pushing through the elephant grass and then following a forest path to end up at the klong where we usually start. The front-runners followed paper right along the klong, but wiser heads smelled a back-check and quickly found paper to the left along the klong.

When the trail reached Bangkok Land Alley and turned right, old-timers knew that this is usually a back-check, so a few of them stayed on the klong path, but the trail really did continue right to an open field. After a check beside the mooban wall, the trail left the field through a house with a pack of little yapping dogs, and out the house’s gate to cross the next klong. Right along the klong, we ducked under the first bridge and then climbed up from the klong path to the road at the next bridge (which I think was Ramkamhaeng Soi 118).

Most of us followed the chalk arrow left at the first intersection, although Ajarn Kee Mao claims that he followed the trail around in a circle back to this same intersection. After another dirt path, we found ourselves at a lovely lake with some very expensive houses beside it, and the paper took us down Ramkamhaeng Soi 110 to a klong, which we crossed and ran down another dirt path.

The good news was that the trail finally stopped heading away from our starting point, and started turning back toward home. The bad news was that we had to run through the streets around Krungthep Kreeta Road, which were full of traffic heading home at that time. After a couple of kilometres dodging cars and breathing exhaust fumes, we finally reached the Athletes’ Village and the klong that leads under the Outer Ring Road. We risked our lives crossing the frontage road, and trotted back to the restaurant.

KC claimed that the trail was 7.8 kilometres. I thought that it was a bit more. Ajarn Kee Mao did a lot more.

Nobody listened when the GM called for the circle, but the heavens suddenly opened, and most hashers sought refuge from the downpour under the restaurant’s roof. A visitor and a couple of returners, then the Religious Advisor (Sizzler) didn’t have any material, so Ajarn Kee Mao asked for a couple of charges from the floor, and the coveted Hash Prick was awarded to Normal for wearing a body condom. Normal proved that the condom was not only water-proof but also beer-proof, as she poured the entire pint over her covered head.

Dinner was excellent, especially the beef soup and the raw prawns. The usual suspects stayed on drinking beer after the rest of the hashers left, until the restaurant finally switched off the lights and the alcoholics took the hint to leave, adjourning to Ajarn Kee Mao’s flat for an ad hoc AA meeting (which is an entirely separate story).