Run: 1963, 25 January 2021, Burns Night run
Location: IMF Restaurant, Bang Krachao
Hares: Virginia Slim and Noriega

For Virginia Slim's run we had 26 Harriers, 12 Harriettes, 0 new boots and 4 visitors, total 42. Returners included the Brenda “Splat”, Svend “Father Joseph”, Tom “Pussy Virus”, Louis “Moonlight”, Colin “Hema”, Frank “Noriega”, Kanokpan “Off Limits”, Rin “Jumpstart”, Pauline “Hell’s Angel”, Tim “Crash”, and Jim “Virginia Slim”. Visitors were “Snakebite”, “Pat Pom”, “Whippet Cream” and Daniel (the Swedish bagpiper).

It was advertised as the Robert Burns Day run, and I naively thought that there would be a free T-Shirt, so arrived early, but it was not to be. All I got was a request to do the scribe report.

So who was Robert Burns anyway? Well apparently, he was a Scottish poet who penned "Auld Lang Syne" and was born on 25-January-1759. So Run #1963 was his 261st birthday !

So much for the history lesson. In celebration of the event, Virginia Slim and Noriega laid a short but challenging trail from the IMF restaurant in Phra Padaeng … complete with copious amount of Whisky, Haggis and a Bag Piper. The highlight of the circle was the Bag Piper, but since I am not a regular Monday Hasher, then I don’t know who it was. But he was good !

Things appeared to go slightly off the rails at 4:00pm, with an old lady getting upset at the chalk marks crossing the road from the restaurant and heading directly into land on the other side. It was all in Thai but went like "you’re f*cking not going to run over there and trample on my crops". So Noriega went over and the resolved the issue with the locals over a few beers. And Patpom, Sizzler and Whippet Cream bought out their entire stock of Barbeque Duck Bills, so we were good to go.

One of the joys of Hashing in recent years, is comparing one’s Strava trial with everyone else. But recently this has got completely out of hand, with some Hashers running the run-site, and adding this extra distance to there run trail. Guilty were Knockout Neptune, Boob-a-lube and Tom Yum Kung. Tom Yum Kung pushed it to the extreme by running via Rama-3 and had to rescued en-route by Pussy Virus on the way to the run-site.

The run started on time with a mixture of runners, walkers, short cutters and non-runners. A fifth category includes Spinning Dwarf and Hater Peacox who just simply bailed out mid-way through the run and back to beer-truck early. Oh, and a sixth category which includes Jump Start who arrived really late and didn’t even go out on the trail.

I got to the front of the pack early, just in case the grumpy old lady had returned to the other side of the road. But then immediately got led astray by Boob-a-lube who was looking for alternative trails that didn’t follow the paper across the bamboo bridges.

Another late arrival was Drunk’n Donut, whose presence on the trail was indicated by what sounds like a steam locomotive coming up from behind.

Over-all it was good trail. And Strava also later revealed that everyone was on paper for all the trail EXCEPT for the front runners Pussy Virus and Boob-a-lube.

Three visitors, and a whole bunch of returners, that included Hema, 4x2, the hares, Mother Mary & Sven, Hot Chilly, Jumpstart and a few more. All must have been lured by the prospect of a free T-shirt?

The circle ended with the POTW, and being a stupid concept, it was at this time that both the Scribe and Captain Erik decided to leave the circle. But from the distance it appeared to be a combination of a repeat nomination from last week and domestic dispute between 2 others.

The POTW was quickly brought to an end by the arrival of the Bag Piper blasting out "Scotland The Brave" after which Virginia Slim slaughtered a trio of Haggis’s.