Run:- 2081, 13 November 2023 - AGM
Location:- Nakon In, Im Pla Pao
Hares:-Bullit and Spinning Dwarf

Special Edition 2 write ups, something to read in the toilet!

The Beagle Caper (A tale of Bunny and the Monday AGM)

Yours Truly shepherded Bunnie from Victory Monument to the Monday AGM. It was a bus to the pier in our neighborhood, river taxi up to the Rama V bridge pier, and walk to the run site.

But Bunnie became a Nervous Nellie, insisting that we leave very early because we’d miss the start if we followed my schedule. So I humored him, and he was very quiet when he saw that the river taxi took only 20 minutes instead of the hour he’d been told.

Me: "Who told you?" Bunnie: "mumble, mumble". Me again: "WHO told you?" Bunnie: "KC".

That figures – the world’s expert on everything. (The real problem is, he's usually correct.)

So we disembarked before the Rama V bridge, at the pier where I expected the hares would have a beer stop at the little noodle shop there. Sho ‘nuf, there was an arrow "Drinks Stop". (More on that later,)

We had more than an hour to walk the 3 km to the run site, so I suggested a beer first. Bunnie: "No, gotta get to the run site."

So we walked the trail backwards, except for a couple of shortcuts.

After perhaps ten minutes a beagle spotted us, waddled out the house gate, and joined us. It was a very old beagle that stopped unexpectedly now and then, sometimes pissing on the shrubberies, sometimes tripping Bunnie. Sometimes tripping and pissing on Bunnie. It accompanied us for over two klicks, despite our attempts to turn it back.

It also caught the attention of a few packs of snarling dogs. It walked placidly through them, while Bunnie climbed trees, eventually becoming a stick-wielding hound. I was bemused by the scene.

Eventually we came to the right turn on a soi that led to Tanon Nakhon In.

A couple drove past toward Nakon In on a motor scooter, and then stopped. Beagle jumped on board.

Huh??? I asked the driver if beagle were his dog. "Nope, never saw it before." I said it’s not ours either.

We walked on without looking back. But I almost sensed that beagle would ask for a ride back to his house. And get it.

Now, back to the "drinks stop". Vagina Slime had marinated a fruit salad in gin the night before. Amazing how a bit of sliced apple can soak up almost a shot of gin. At the drinks stop he dumped in fruit juice and at least a fifth of vodka into a small cool box, and iced it down.

He sampled it occasionally while waiting for the pack to arrive to be certain it met his standards.

When we arrived, VS was also quite well marinated. It was hi-octane stuff, what in the bad old days you fed to your college date. It was too strong for the weaker of the pack, even for Bullit, who bought beers for them and himself.

Back at the run site, when the run shirt was handed out a few meters away from the circle, I was too blitzed to make the effort to get the shirt; there were maybe a dozen of us in the same condition.

And that’s my anonymous AGM report. (I withheld the name of the beagle.)

ANONYMOUSE WRITE UP

The 13th of November was a hot rainless day in Bangkok. The street vendors sold their noodles to tourist in elephant pants, monitor lizards sunbathed next to the lakes in Lumpini Park and the BTS was full of commuters in route to work. It was a typical Monday. It wasn’t until the later hours of the day, after the work had been done and the sun started to set, that a group of degenerates made their way to Nonthaburi. Dressed in graphic t-shirts, shiggy socks, hoka shoes, and running shorts,

50 members of the Hash House Harriers congregated in the parking lot of a local restaurant in attendance for the Annual General Meeting for the Bangkok Monday Hash!

The committee members made the decisions to waive r*n fees for this event for all Monday members. Hash Cash only collected a small contribution from all participants to pay for the On On On. As the Hash waited for the r*n start, you could hear old friends exchanging pleasantries which quickly turned into banter. Off in the corner of the parking lot, Checkless approached a junior member of the Hash and advised him that he would be responsible for providing a record of the AGM, offered him no additional information and walked away. The clock struck 17:15 and the Grand Mistress instructed everyone to circle up.

Chalk talk was conducted by the Hare and co Hare, Bullit and Spinning Dwarf. After a short explanation of the trail markings, the Hare sent the pack on its way.

The trail was mainly laid in paper that was shredded just like Na He Man’s shirtless bod. In addition to half naked white men on the trail, we were also joined by two Hashers who own cigars but not own watches apparently, Pussy Virus and Amy. The pack was made up of walkers, joggers and racists but the Hares did a terrific job marking the trail and setting good checks to keep the pack together.

Half way through the r*n the Hash was graced with a beverage stop hosted by Virginia Slim. Beer was available at the drink stop but the fan favorite was a fruity Gin punch that Virginia Slim concocted in a dirty 5 liter cooler that I assume was bought in the 90’s at a second hand store. Auntie Bitch cried in his beer as he told the pack he had a Gin allergy.

After the sun set and the group finished making fun of Tokoroten’s tiny cup, the pack returned to the trail. The trail was a nice variety of city, klong ways, residential and some jungle. In the end most Hashers clocked around 6km for the whole r*n.

Back at the parking lot as the remainder of the Hashers shuffled in, you could hear the sound of beers being cracked open and the smell of Nibbles frying up some chicken wings. Off in the opposite corner sat a group of Harriettes with their bottles of Prosecco, clean shoes and not a drop of sweat.

Hash Piss set up a great post trail spread of cheeses, crackers, nuts and fruits. During a discussion at the snack table, Drinks Like a Girl insisted that the Ritz cracker was far superior to the Keebler Club cracker . . . I don’t know about that. Before the circle commenced, the committee handed out the free AGM t-shirts which had an amazing design. However, Boobalube was displeased that they did not have any XXXXL shirts available for him to wear as a night gown like Ebenezer Scrooge. After we all caught a buzz and the shirts were handed out, Grand Mistress instructed us all to circle up once again.

This was run #2081. We had two New Boots and 7 Visitors. One of the visitors was a jolly American named Wanksgiving, which was odd to me because his facial hair made him look like a Walrus. I would like to make a motion to grant Wanksgiving with an honorary BMH3 name "I am the Walrus."

Always Cums Last conducted the general business, handing out down downs to the necessary parties before turning things over to the XXXXL shirt loving RA. There were few charges during the circle but the highlight was easily the Prick of the Week. Out of the 5 nomination, some were warranted charges and some were petty. After careful consideration, the like minded drinkers unanimously voted Dambuster as Prick of the Week and dressed him in the ceremonial attire. Before the circle concluded the RA led us in a new song with a French theme that made mention of saggy tits and frizzy hair for Always Cums Last’s final down down as GM. Announcements were made and the Hares directed to pack to the restaurant for social eating and drinking.

It didn’t take long for the wine to start flowing at dinner. Words started to slur and laughter filled the air. As is tradition at this point of the evening, Tickler whipped out his Black Cock and offered it to anyone who was interested. Mid way through the meal someone yelled "hash hush" and the GM stood on a chair at the front of the dinning room. At this time the GM awarded positions for the new Committee.

After the new committee was appointed, we continued drinking and eating and enjoying the company of good friends. One by one the Hashers disappeared into the night. It was a successful AGM to say the least.

This account of events was made under the influence of alcohol so the historical authenticity and validity of this publication may be inaccurate.