BMH3 Run report

Run: 1589
Date: 2 September 2013
Location: Rama 4 Bridge
Hares: Pink Panther and Over Sexed
Scribe: No Good Boyo

We gathered at the new restaurant under the Rama 4 flyover. Nuan from Savannakhet with her lovely legs was there in black, but our beautiful babe from Bang Kruay was not. She was two Saturdays ago and we missed her so much. However, my reverie was interrupted by the pack starting. They tramped off across the road to the river path passing the 7-11 and through the Wat. The first check completely b*ggered up the front runners who tried to hack their way through impenetrable bush, but the casual back markers including Love Canal and found the only real way out to the left through the small sala, across a very dodgy bridge and into the bush. This L shaped bridge is slowly becoming more and more unstable which means that sometime in the future on similar runs, Tickler will have to re-trace his steps a very long way in order to regain the trail. But I did notice that there was little water there and it was possible to cross on reasonably dry land.

FRB’s Teradej, Nogood Boyo, LC and Dripper were away on the path to the main road and across the now denuded rice field by the time the pack got a look in. Rumour has it that KC leading his men, as is his wont, led them to the impenetrable forest and consulting his Garmin at the end of the run, found that he had squeezed a 11km run from a 7.5km trail!!! AKM realising his gross foolishness in following this ‘leader’ quickly came to his senses and abandoned the run to head for home at the first opportunity. As Stalin once said about the Soviet Army… it takes them more courage to retreat than to advance…

The rice field now shorn of all its rice which was likely stored in go-downs, deteriorating and gathering weasels while waiting for a buyer somewhere – anywhere, in the world! The field proved a problem at a check. But certain hashers had a good idea of where to head for. And so Nogood Boyo and Tiradej called ‘on on’ across the road into “Van Aubels Loop” through more denuded fields. ABB took over the lead at this point and after a tricky check we found the trail back to the road. We had done a good two kilometres through the fields and come back out on the road about 200 metres from where we went in. Nice one hare!

Glancing back over the fields the shirtless lily-white torsos of PV and DD could be seen in the distance. Indeed a wonderful sight for Thai advertisers and PR men whose latest mobile app’ is now available for all those Thai chicks who love their skin as white as - let’s say lily-white. This is called “krajok wat phiew khao” the white skin mirror test!!! Of course one has to laugh at this vacuous vanity, but this to many is very serious – particularly to the manufacturers of the whitening crap.

But back to the run. ABB scuttled around in Wat Pa Lelai where the arrows led us, but the trail was found following the road towards the river. Down the road towards Wat Toie and then we turned into the right through Wat Intarim and through a back alley on to the road which led us back to the start.

Pink Panther and Oversexed, our two local hares were given down downs and various other odds and sods were called in to the circle. PV was admonished for showering in public on the roadside causing cute ‘sekoys’ to avert their eyes as they were driven by their ‘dek wen’ into shadier parts of Nonthaburi. The evidence was still there to see – a river of water from the car on the opposite side into the restaurant entrance.

AKM then moved into the amphitheatre for his RA duties which were carried out with usual aplomb. The crowd’s interest was well managed and peaked when the time came for TOTW. Carl, the ‘Canadian comb-over’ was I thought a sure bet, this guy was surely a son of Scottish Bog and or The Bug! But then came PV, Noriega and Som. It ended up with a runoff between the latter two and they both seemed to share the spoils. Som with the dick over her shoulder and the arse half way up her back and Noriega desperately fighting with Som to chugg down the yard of ale made a comic sight indeed.

The on on was very well attended and yours truly was surprised when the hour struck 11 and beers were still being ordered. By this time ‘Canadian comb-over’ was dancing a shuffle on his own and borrowed B20 to give to Nuan the waitress as a tip!!! AKM borrowed B100 from Id for beer contributions and Noriega and yours truly took a trip down Bangkok memory lane, recalling the Mosquito Bar days. Even Crutch in the Bangkok Post wrote the other day that he went into that bar on a quiet night and witnessed three fights!! I remember getting stoked up at the Seamen’s Club (now the car park by the Sanitary Section), in order to get enough courage up to walk into the Mosquito Bar on my own.

Then Noriega created much interest and general discussion over what uses the humble chicken egg could be put to when dealing with your ‘squeeze’. Something to do with getting the egg white out and using it appropriately. I must admit I have been on this mortal coil for some time and know about the uses of Mars Bars, Peanut Butter (the Creamy kind), Yoghurt and occasionally, yes, Marmite!!! But never egg white. My local 7-11 kid was surprised to see me at the counter just before midnight, not with the usual six pack of beers but with a six-pack of fresh eggs and a drunken grin!!

Well done Malinee for turning up with the beer and snacks overcoming the hashing injury to your leg. Thanks to the hares for an enjoyable run and good food (with whisky) at the restaurant.

PS: Jeff. If you read this we wish you all the best for a swift recovery, we want to see you back soon.

On On

Bangkok Monday Hash House Harriers