Run:- 2098, 11 March 2024
Location:- Pakkret, Wat Toei
Hare:- Tinker assisted by a phantom

Wat Toey in Pak Kret. Bullet grumbled "that's my patch" and almost missed the start. So at 5:15 fifteen of us were ready-ish. It had taken your scribe an hour to get there including a bit of roadworks at the end. The Hash running sites are roughly divided east and west, the Harriettes preferring east. So not too many, but we'll represented by pat pong and gung pet. Patpong’s driver snake bite wandered around with a giant camera with his head in the sky looking out for pigeons as when they see a camera pointed at them they launch a coordinated aerial poo bombing attack, which is why snakebite wore a big floppy hat. More about poo later. We had two tourist visitors from Newcastle (tits and grabber) who now lives somewhere in Turkey. A flying surprise visit by grannies tits who was here to have all his teeth serviced, it was cheaper to fly here than send his teeth by post. Our GM called us together. He called for the Hashers in the sky to accept our fellow Hasher Gengis 'disgusting' Ertuna who had just passed away. Gengis had joined us in April 2003, his last run was on the November 2018 AGM. He ran on 221 trails with us.

And so the ambling started with tinker’s advice "it's only 5km" then all stopped as we waited for the ferry. Long strings of barges being towed up river kept us waiting, then over for a breezy river crossing. On the other side Mr Nigeria galloped away chased by our 2 Harriettes, but only for a short while. The first check. Boobly took dripper by the hand and whispered in his ear, "come with me I know a better way". Drippers eyes wide with anticipation followed at booblies heels. Dripper returns to somewhere near Scotland in a week and still wanted more of the Bangkok experience, and any port in a storm would do nicely. Milling around for what seemed ages, until tickler went back and crawled through a small alley. Onto the streets for a bit, then along a narrow klong path. Patpong marking the way until we reached a busy market. A good check and all caught up. Whereupon another long check with some zooming away "we found only one arrow so it must be back" bugger! after running around like headless chickens we decided to have a better look at this one arrow. And there was a second bending back into a field, and then there was a beer stop with Tinker acting as barman.

We had lost Gung Pet. Ah there she was having had supper at the market followed by a 'poo stop' Now this is common among marathon runners, so competitive are they that taking a 'poo stop' without loosing their pace is quite common and normal. There is quite a technique to be learnt, and fun to watch, and there may be online guidance for beginners, but she would not reveal her poo secrets. Senator roared that we were drinking poor Burmese workers beer, but they seemed happy enough. Boobly exhausted by his exertions with dripper, headed away on the trail before us. Now we come to the shiggy scrappy bit into a mini forest. As chalk was a looong way back of course it could not be found. Patpong thought it might be back but led us forward into the small backstreets where we picked up the trail. And through a closed market, which upset Gung Pet as she was still hungry. Back over the river and we were done in 5km.

Our webnerd/GM opened the circle and thanked Tinker for a good attempt, and thought he could do better after a few more practice trails. Tinker blamed his phantom Co hare for misleading him. But he did take a drink on behalf of his phantom friend. Now we know why Tinker seems to be talking to himself, and why he confuses waitresses when ordering a meal; he is consulting his phantom friend at the same time. The GM gave our perpetual visitors patpong and snake bite a drink, together with our visitors from the Turkish Hash. Grannies tits as a returner. Tinker as RA gave his phantom another drink and asked if we could give him (he had now revealed his phantom was male) a Hash name. Silence! Then looking at Tinkers long shorts the name 'Scrotum' was agreed. From now on Tinker would be referred to in the plural tense as Tinkers Scrotum. Many were brought in for a drink. Senator almost got POTW but it went naturally to our pretty visitor 'tits'. The on on on was helped by a cooling river breeze. Scrotum confused Tinker by ordering 3 extra dishes of fried fish, unexpected but nice, and with the usual oily omelette the evening came to an end. Thank you Tinker and his phantom Scrotum.